and little accomplishments

must have haircut since signing of school clearance requires semi-military-head-form hairstyle for males. goodbye, shield of my flailing lack of self-esteem.

today i felt great (and until now, actually) because i am already done with all the school projects, except one, which would really take long for anyone to finish. i see my classmates still working and rushing over their school work and in my mind i am like: "that's what you get for procrastinating. hah. look at me. i am FREE". maybe this is what they call Schadenfreude? uh.  i am just very glad i am done with it. (damn i should treat myself to a sundae or something!) 

the father of one of my friends. him and her are both the type of persons likely to be described in a Haruki Murakami novel.

this day began with the miserable accident of having pulled off the side zippers of my father's rescuer boots recklessly (the whole small zipper handle was REMOVED! now you can't pull it up!) which i have had the pleasures of using for a good lot of time now. i am devastated not particularly because it can not be used anymore but because i know my father will massacre my eardrums one more time and proceed with a blasphemous speech of how i am a demon sent to make Earth suffer once he learns of what happened. i must lie now and say i never knew it is broken and it was okay last time i used it. which, now that i think of it, is not effective, since it will only prove how careless i am in terms of any specific bodily movement; that characteristic of Shin the whole family despises most. this is totally worrying me and i have to find a way to put the blame on somebody else. same way my father does with his mistakes.

at school, we barely had nothing to do since the teachers hypothetically considered yesterday as our final day already and sure enough they had food in the faculty office. wait, what do teachers eat anyways? surely their cult of pedagogical violence involves mastication of human fetus and spaghetti made of brains of students whose cardiac arrests were cause by their brutally sarcastic exams.

oh you special special person~ <3

we had an exam in Special Topic Course (the subject in which each one of us had a turn to hold a seminar with our topic of choice)  and i just can not believe how stupid my friend's answer was in the question "what are 10 signs of being gay?" some of her responses were: -rich, -wise -artistic. i have no idea what she had in mind when writing that. in fact i have no idea if she had a mind at all in the first place.
and then submission of the myths our class had fabricated for Mythology class. we are already done with it since yesterday because i am an earnest writer (kidding.) and have finished it quickly. my two groupmates are lucky because all they had to do was type and print it and then relax like some basic bitches. the three of us just watched how panicked everybody else is with their prose and were like: "*yaaawn* this is getting boring."

as i am writing this, i am also Photoshop-cleaning some drawings (which are appearing in this entry) i did today. i am also totally digging the playlist Charlie did for Patrick in the book The Perks of Being a Wallflower. it's called One Winter and i absolutely love all songs in it except Scarborough Fair. sorry, Simon & Garfunkel.

so jealous of couples who love and lust each other equally

Miss Del Rey, will you serve me a lemonade

on the way home i was listening to this and unintentionally imagined my death and funeral and i was "assuming" she would cry. i ended up teary-eyed too. how abnormal.

and lust

i think being lustful is not just something one has decided to feel upon himself. 

there is always some kind of otherworldly force involved in getting such sensations like that. 

and i believe it goes beyond scientific explanations about pheromones and hormonal functions.

lust is totally evil and will make you do bad things. the guiltiest of pleasures.

however, we human beings have superior minds. we are intelligent and we have the brain that holds access and control to almost every inch of the body.

lust is powerful. but you can be more powerful than that.

it is, still, beautiful.

and christmas eve.

i am just going to post three watercolour fun stuff i did yesterday and today. here goes.

Demon Of Christmas Eve

Red Ridin' Hood

and then here goes the whole image previewed in my former post.

Ugly December

this is all for now. i hope you feel my unhappiness with the sparse usage of words in this entry. ha.

have a merry christmas.

and life getting better; thanks to photo-mixing.

this is basically just a follow-up to what i had previously written.
i have no school days anymore, not until 2013 (hurrah for ever) so i think my blog will really be dull and unupdated not unless my father lends me his laptop more often, like how he did today. (all day long i have this.) unfortunately the internet is very very very slow; even twitter DPs can't be loaded half the time. .
i guess Shin really lives a kind of life where everything supposed to be convenient always comes with a terrific downside. like, i have nice facial features (apparently) but then i have pimples. i can draw, but i don't have a scanner, and my hand trembles a lot. i have plenty of books, but my eyes are already well damaged. congratulations, Shin. *rolls eyes*  for that matter i really envy people who get to have what they want. however problematic their love lives would be,  they are materially complete. i envy them. i envy everyone. ugh.

it can be said that this photo is a "preview" of the work i'm collaborating/working on. i dub it as The Sticker Project, since it's like i am putting stickers on a photos of someone.. heehee. i don't know if you know that person i'm working with, but that person (see? am not even telling if it's a he or she! Shin makes a good secret-keeper) is pretty big on that person's field of interest! hah! young man above is baby Dylan

---
there are some matters i need to discuss with the deciding regions of my brain right now;
1) will i go to school tomorrow? for Saturday class? where we will have a not-to-be-recorded examination and my professor will lend me his copy of The Trial by Franz Kafka?
2) will there really be another christmas party underneath the supervision of our class adviser? will i attend?
3) will i attend overnight party in friend Alm's place? where there's apparently beer and adult stuff?
4) will i buy a huge, expensive watercolour pad?
5) will i pursue living this life?

gaaah~*** i don't know! i am terrible at making decisions. basically because i tend to regret everything.

i wonder how it would feel when one day you took a photo of yourself and then when you check how it looked, you saw someone else's face instead. ha ha.  that kind of incident happened to me once in a side mirror. i mentally freaked out. always in my mind only. my physical self reacts delayedly all the time.

as always, in the end of every journal entry, i get this sensation that i have something else important to write, but when i rack my brains (oftentimes i bang my head in the wall) for anything to say, there's nothing. which leads me to this conclusion that Shin is actually just a skull of negative helium. what.

and snippets

i think at this point you already know that i don't blog, like, immediately after a whole day or something. some of my post discuss things that occurred two days ago, etc.

when i buy a new watercolour pad i want to draw people like this. heavily inspired by Organized Robots by Steven Meisel.

something i did for cover of Erlyn's notebook.

and the ultimate launch of Portraits of 500 Lovely Organisms

i have decided to do some kind of an art project that will probably span a long amount of time. it is called Portraits of 500 Lovely Organisms. inspired by Akira Horikawa's 1000 Drawing Project. i am very much indebted to him in terms of my current style and perspective, so yes. he is such an inspiration. i message him sometimes but he rarely replies. it's okay. it's very very very okay.

his blog title and video is also the inspiration of my blog URL.

below is the original first four "organisms" i did. all were rejected. more for paper-quality reasons than the drawings itself. that's how Shin does it.

and here are the official three,. photos, however, are hardly convenient.

#001 God

#002 Mother of Everything

#003 David.

i hope i don't get lazy because getting to do the actual five-hundred sounds like a superb achievement.

and sketchpad feces

more drawings can be found here. just some stuff that kept me busy these days.
i am worried that my sketchpad is being filled with senseless, random crap. sorry, mate.